1. Life will present you with unexpected
opportunities, and you won’t always know in advance which are the important
moments. Above all, it’s the quality of your relationships that will determine
the quality of your life. Invest in your connections, even those that seem
inconsequential.
“Just ask questions. You never know what will happen.”
~write a thank-you note, and to specifically
mention two things that were memorable about the experience.
Always take the time to
acknowledge people—and not just when you know you have something to gain. If
you show interest in them, they will be interested in you. People react to
kindness with kindness, to respect with respect. Relationships—even brief
ones—are doorways to opportunity. P 180
2. From a very early age, I understood that a
language is a doorway to another world—its culture, sensibility, aesthetic, and
humor. Different parts of me come alive when I switch languages.
The time I invested in learning languages was
essential to my career. When I arrived in the U.S., with no papers and no fancy
degrees, the only thing that differentiated me was my languages, and the multiple
perspectives they afforded me.
In my work, I
speak with people from all around the world about the most personal of matters.
Language is intimate, and there is no way I could do the work I do if I had to
communicate in translation. P 180-181
3. In moments when you don’t believe in yourself,
you need other people who believe in you. They can hold you up when you falter
and keep you from hitting the ground. Other people see you differently from the
way you see yourself. And that multiplicity of perspectives is essential to
making us who we are. Identity is always a two-way street—created from the
inside out and the outside in. Many people feel that when they are overwhelmed
or lose focus, they need to retreat into themselves and shut out the world.
They think that there is greater merit and virtue in figuring things out alone.
That doesn’t work for me. I find myself, and activate my greatest creative
capacities, in relationship with the beautiful diversity of other human beings. P 181
ESTHER PEREL has been called the most
important game-changer in sexuality and relational health since Dr. Ruth. Her
TED Talks on maintaining desire and rethinking infidelity have more than 17
million views, and she’s both seen and tested everything imaginable in 34 years
of running her private therapy practice in New York City. Esther is the author of
the international bestseller Mating in Captivity, which has been translated
into 26 languages. Fluent in nine of them (I’ve heard her in person), this
Belgian native now brings her multicultural pulse to her new book The State of
Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity. Her creative energy is currently focused on
co-creating and hosting an Audible original audio series, Where Should We
Begin?
Referenc
Ferriss, Timothy. Tribe of Mentors:
Short Life Advice from the Best in the World (P. 179). Houghton Mifflin
Harcourt. Kindle Edition.
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